14 Holes-in-One

Tiger Woods cheated on his wife with 14 different women and, in a patriarchal society, expects forgiveness.

How many holes-in-one does a man need to make him fulfilled?

Apparently, in Tiger Woods’ case, fourteen relieves him. Woods managed to cheat on his wife, Elin Nordegren, with fourteen different “women” before he got caught.

Now I’m sure he’s soooooo sorry.

There many theories about what happened the night Woods was exposed, the most exciting of which include Nordegren chasing Woods with a 9-iron and smashing in the back window of his car as he sped away frantically from their Florida mansion. However Woods was caught, it doesn’t change that he is an abomination to the human race.

His many indiscretions have caused quite the uproar but people are mostly forgiving. Why is that? Because he’s a man. If a woman were in Woods’ shoes, she’d be expected to grovel for forgiveness. Woods just gave a public apology and went to sex therapy and just like that, everything is okay with him and his public. His home life is a different story although Nordegren has allegedly dropped her divorce lawyer.

“I’m deeply sorry,” claimed Wood during a press conference. “[My actions were] irresponsible and selfish.”

Why apologize to the public, though? What good is that for his marriage? Sure, his image has been ruined but he’s still one of the best golfers of his time. But really, shouldn’t he be at home begging his wife for forgiveness? Shouldn’t he be on his knees, possibly crossing shards of glass to regain her trust and heart?

Girls go for that stuff.

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